by : lacylit10 Life Lessons

Changing Things Up.

Being unemployed, I’ve had a lot of time to think about things. It’s been hard to find the balance between thinking enough to process and not thinking too much. Too much is not so good.

Mostly, I’ve been trying to determine how I can monetize all the things I do for free. Blogging. Facts from Farmers. Good Ol’ Girls Club. And there’s all this shit on the internet that tells you how you can make money from these things, but first you must click here, purchase this, download that. Bleh. It’s so uninspiring. Besides, apparently, I prefer to do things in the most challenging of ways.

What dawned on me is that this website is my space and I can do whatever I want with it. I can make it whatever I want. Why this revelation only now came to me as a light bulb moment, I don’t know. But here we are. So I’m changing things up a bit.

I’ve written editorials that I post to the Facts from Farmers website, but I do not post here. I have political editorial drafts that I haven’t posted, because Facts from Farmers’ website isn’t necessarily the right platform. And I write all of these things about my leadership and self-awareness journey that I don’t share with anyone who isn’t subscribed here.

This could be a frustrated expression where nothing changes, or it could be the start of something really great. Either way, I have a lot of stuff going on in my head that I need to get out somehow. And if it’s not through paid employment at the moment, then I’ve gotta make the most of what I do have. This is it.

I’m not quite sure what it’s going to look like, so I might go through a few iterations before I find the process that works for me. I hope you’ll continue tagging along.

by : lacylit10 Life Lessons

All the Things I Can Do.

I have never been a big dreamer, and I’m actually somewhat thankful for that. I’m far too practical and reasonable to dream big. I feel big dreams have the potential to put unattainable goals in your distant future, and too many variables can pop up between now and then. I would rather take opportunities as they come or plan for things within a timeframe that is practical, reasonable, and attainable. 

I’m also quite aware that the future is not guaranteed. I have a hard time dreaming or planning too far ahead knowing full well the opportunity may never come. 

In the beginning of a leadership training I attended, a group of us were asked what we would do if we found out we only had a month to live. Most people responded that they would travel. I was the only person who said I would prefer to spend time at home with family and friends. Luggage, airports, airplanes, strangers, cab drivers, currency exchanges – honestly, ugh. That is not how I want to spend the last few weeks of my life.

It’s the people that we share experiences with that matter, and the idea of sharing my last days with people who care about me far exceeds my desire to explore the world. I want my last days to be filled with love, laughter, gratitude, and meaningful moments, not bustling streets in different parts of the world, exploring different cultures that put me outside my comfort zone. No. I want quiet, peaceful, safe, and comfortable. That atmosphere with friends and family will fill my cup up, and that’s how I want to remember living my life – fulfilled.

When I ponder the future and the opportunities that lie ahead, it’s foggy. I don’t know what it looks like beyond a short distance in front of me. And I’m okay with that.

For so long, I’ve been working on stretching myself so far that I’ve become a slave to my own routines, and the rules I’ve created for myself to be professionally successful. Make sure I get 8 hours of sleep. Eat dinner at a decent hour. Don’t stay out late on a work night. But my personality is actually far more easy going than the boundaries I’ve created for myself to operate within. But my commitments and obligations required structure in order for me to prioritize and complete. I spread myself thin, and it required a bit of rigidity.

What I hope (and have been planning) for, is more flexibility, so I have the availability to take opportunities as they come. 

I once heard that life is what happens when you least expect it, but that doesn’t mean you can’t have a blueprint in your back pocket. I think that’s a healthy and realistic way to approach life. My family, friends, values, morals, and ethics are the roots that keep me grounded. My finances, home, and career make up the trunk that keeps me stable. The branches represent the unexpected – all the different things I can do and all the different directions those opportunities may point me. Some grow long and strong, others stay short, and some break off.

I can confidently say that I finally feel like I am to a point where my roots are deep, and my trunk is strong enough to withhold future growth from a variety of different experiences. And I am excited for what that may bring.

by : lacylit10 Life Lessons

Dreams.

I have so many unpublished post drafts in my dashboard, countless others in a Word document, and several others in a Google Drive folder. As always, I’ve been taking some time to reflect. When I read through these posts, it’s an insightful reminder of the emotions felt, lessons learned, and journey taken over the past year.

Many posts do not get published, because my thoughts feel incomplete or I feel the post will be read in standalone judgement rather than in the greater context of who I am and what I write about. I don’t want my thoughts on a specific topic to be taken the wrong way, especially when I am usually always open-minded, inquisitive, generally speaking, and most importantly: still learning.

I wanted to be a writer ever since I can remember. When I look at successful writers and how they got their start through blogging, the story is mostly the same: frequent publishing and sharing – neither of which I really do. They say that to be a professional writer, you need to have been published and paid for your work as a main occupation. Sounds stressful to me, honestly. I want to be comfortable with the words I publish. Topics are usually meaningful, and my thoughts cannot be rushed to reach a deadline.

Dreams change.

Sure, I would love to see my name atop a best seller list. But today, I am content. It’s not a dream I want to chase at this stage of my life, and I am pleased to publish what I want when I want to my handful of readers. (So thank you for stopping by. ☺️)

I’ve actually been feeling professional contentment for a few months now. And can I just tell you how freaking amazing it feels?

A master’s degree was something I kind of always wanted, but never really thought I would get. Done. ✅ And I recently started a new job at the level I had been working so hard to reach. ✅ The milestones I set for myself have been achieved, and at this point, I don’t have anything specific on the horizon. It feels so. incredibly. peaceful. to be able to just enjoy the view. 🌅

But that’s not to say I’m not working on other goals. At Facts from Farmers, we’ve been non-publicly working with growers in our community to do amazing things for our farmworkers. I’ve been spending intentional time with family and friends, and giving myself the grace to know when I won’t be bringing them my best self. And Kali and I have become BFFs while leisurely working on our roping partnership.

This is more for me than it is for you, but it’s okay to plateau. It’s okay to put dreams on hold. It’s also okay to scrap those dreams all together.

I’ve been hustling for 10+ years to get where I am. And truthfully, where I am, isn’t even a dream I knew I had until I started working toward it.

When I intentionally think about when people refer to life as a crazy ride, I can’t help but chuckle how true the statement is. It is full of unexpected twists and turns. There are uphill climbs that you anticipate, where the downward side may be an unexpected drop or a relatively smooth transition. It might be like the Haunted Mansion, where something jumps out and surprises you. It might be like Indiana Jones, when you’re focused on the giant rock coming toward you, but God has other plans and sweeps you away to something else.

I’ve said it time and time again, we learn, we grow, and we change. It would be silly of us to think that our dreams don’t evolve too. But more importantly, we need to recognize when those dreams do change, or diminish, or come true.

by : lacylit10 Life Lessons

Work-Life Balance.

Rachel Hollis says the work-life balance is total crap. She says that the media caught on to the phrase and overused it to the point that we believe it’s an achievable goal – when it’s not. I don’t think she’s entirely wrong.

I have a friend. I love him. He’s great. But every once in awhile he says something that makes me want to straight up punch him in the face. We’ll be talking about something, and he’ll say, “Well, you’re not married, and you don’t have kids.” While I try to casually let it go, my internal response is more a series of: 🤯😡😤🤬.

You guys – that is a low blow.

First of all, it’s not like I don’t want those things, so thanks for pointing out that I don’t have them (asshole 🙄). Also, it’s not like I don’t have family or friends or obligations or meetings or appointments. It’s not like I don’t have financial ties or budgets to follow. It’s not like I don’t have no persons (or pets) to consider in the decisions I make. It’s not like I have nothing of importance in my life.

But just because I’m not married and don’t have kids does not mean that I don’t struggle with the juggle. (That sounds entirely inappopriate, so I kept it.) It also does not mean that your priorities hold more value than mine; our priorities are just different.

Don’t misconstrue that statement either. Yes, I recognize that a child holds more value than a meeting – or whatever. What I’m trying emphasize is that it’s your child and my meeting. Our choices have led us down different paths – neither is better or worse than the other based on our individual needs and destined directions. Don’t overthink it – K?

A co-worker and I frequently talk about competing priorities. For example: the romaine harvest foreman’s tractor broke down, and his crew is not making their normal piece rate. Meanwhile, the automatic Brussels sprouts harvesting machine went down, and the crew has to hand-harvest the field. Each foreman thinks that repairs on their equipment should be completed first = competing priorities.

I struggled with juggling hunting season with day-job demands and side-hustle goals. Hunting was sacrificed, because too many other things that hold greater future value presented themselves. Work held more weight than personal life, and that’s okay. When I took back-to-back hunting trips to New Zealand then Texas, life held more weight.

I think we look at this work-life balance in a perspective that is too small. We are looking at it daily, weekly, or monthly, when we should be looking at it yearly, or biennially or whatever – just some greater timeline.

Life can change in a day or a minute, even. But life happens over time.

We shouldn’t put so much pressure on ourselves to live for the moment or plan our life out, because let’s be real: life is competing priorities. I think it’s more important to recognize when one side is getting heavier than the other and adjust accordingly.

And it’s not about equal time. Two days away in the quiet mountains reconnecting with nature can rejuvenate me for another two weeks of crazy. A half-hour workout at 5 am can pump me up to take on a hectic day. An hour-long session with my horse on a calm Friday evening is a great way to ease into the weekend.

It’s about quality not quantity.

by : lacylit10 Life Lessons

Leap.

When I first applied for the United Fresh Produce Industry Leadership Class 24, we were asked why we wanted to be part of the program. I essentially said that farmers have a story that needs to be told, and if no one else is going to stand up for what we do, then I want to be the one to do it.

It’s kind of funny, because almost everything I’ve worked for personally and professionally has set me up to be that person. And for as much as I want to be the one out there shouting from the rooftops about how important it is to preserve our farming heritage, it terrifies me to be the one in the spotlight.

Over the past few years, it seems that I had been so focused on doing what felt right in my career and developing my leadership skills that I had slowly broken into that storyteller role and didn’t even realize it. And for as much as I’ve unknowingly embraced it, I’ve consciously been fighting it.

I’m not sure who first said that if your dreams don’t scare you, then they’re not big enough. Well, I have dreams, and they freak me the F out.

I know what I need to do to achieve those dreams, but it’s that first step that has been the hardest. And this is that step. It’s exposing my insecurities in order to face my fears and no longer hiding the things that bring me joy.

So, here’s to taking the leap of faith. Please be kind, my armor is down.