by : lacylit10 Life Lessons

Happiness.

Philosophers caution against focusing on happiness as the ultimate good in life, and I tend to agree.  Happiness is subjective; it’s not a constant.  I think we’ve put happiness on this unobtainable pedestal. It’s something that we haven’t actually defined for ourselves as individuals, and we strive for an unrealistic, curated ideal (however it is we perceive that ideal).  Basically, we really don’t even know what we are searching for. 

What we talk about in our culture as happiness is really kind of a revved-up version of happiness. It’s a high-energy [state] — scientists call it a high-arousal positive affect. It’s a feeling, it’s transient, it’s not quality of life, it’s not so many things.

Dr. Laurie Helgoe, The Introvert Entrepreneur

Happiness is an emotion, and emotions are fleeting.  I think a more realistic target for measuring good in life is our overall well-being.

Research has determined 6 dimensions of well-being.  People rank either high or low (defined as high):

  1. Self-Acceptance – positive attitude toward self;
  2. Positive Relations with Others – concerned about the welfare of others; willing to compromise to sustain important ties;
  3. Autonomy – independent, evaluates self by personal standards, resists social pressures;
  4. Environmental Mastery – controls external activities and makes use of surrounding opportunities;
  5. Purpose in Life – has goals and a sense of direction, feels there is meaning to life past and present, holds beliefs and objectives;
  6. Personal Growth – continued development and expansion, open to new experiences, notices improvement in self and behavior.

Life is so. much. more. than just. being. happy.  Failures, negative emotions, disappointing outcomes – all these “bad” things further define the purpose and meaning of our lives.  These aren’t happy things, but they do lead to happiness.  

In high school, I tried out for the softball team and didn’t make it, which made me sad.  But I saw it as an opportunity to work on my skills.  I became stronger, faster, and more knowledgeable about the sport.  I had to put forth more effort using several of the dimensions listed above.  I didn’t try out again the following year, because I got asked to play for an elite travel ball team. The failure actually led to more positivity in my well-being.

Even when present in exemplary lives, philosophers construe happiness not as an end in itself but a byproduct of other, more noble pursuits.

(source)

I’ve been facing an uphill climb the past few months.  I’ve faced several losses, some more significant than others.  Nonetheless, all left me grieving or feeling defeated in some way. Even through these tough times, I recognize that God is working in my life for good reason.  I am becoming stronger and more resilient.  This is character building.  

I have by no means been feeling happy, but overall, I still maintain a positive well-being.  I recognize storms may never stop coming – but neither do the rainbows! 🌈 We can’t judge our life solely on the storms or solely on the rainbows.  Without one, you can’t have the other.  

by : lacylit10 Farming, Leadership

The Middle.

During my United Fresh Produce Industry Leadership Program (#class24 💕), we had an incredibly smart, talented, and beautiful lady guiding us.  Her name was Julie, and she was fabulous.  (Still is!)  She had a very polite and kind way of telling you some honest truths.  She was blunt and funny.  She said a lot of memorable things during our time, but the one that keeps coming to my mind in the midst of this coronavirus pandemic is this: “Get the hell out of middle management as fast as you can.” (Her words exactly.)

Middle managers experience compression by those they lead and those who lead them.  It’s a tough place to be.  As we try to operate as an essential business providing food for millions of Americans who are sheltered in their homes, the amount of pressure and responsibility being placed on our societal function and our team has increased tenfold.

When the CDC first released guidance on preventative measures, it wasn’t anything we weren’t already doing.  Food contact surfaces are routinely cleaned and sanitized, employees frequently wash and sanitize their hands; they are supposed to cough into their elbow, and they are not permitted to come to work sick (among many other good health and hygiene best practices).  But the existing measures we had in place were not enough to protect the health of our employees and the safety of our products, additional measures had/have to be taken.

While our senior leadership is in direct communication with other business executives, regulatory agencies, and trade associations, the role of our middle managers has become even more critical in our day-to-day operations.  The information and guidance we receive changes by the hour.  We are scrambling to keep up, inform our middle managers, train our employees, and enforce many new policies – on top of an already full workload, and entering our busiest season 🥬.

“Middle managers have a complicated relationship with power because power is activated and experienced in the context of interpersonal relationships. When interacting with our superiors, we naturally adopt a more deferential low-power behavioral style. When interacting with subordinates, on the other hand, we adopt a more assertive high-power behavioral style. Failure to conform to these role-based expectations can lead to social conflicts and confusion, so people are very good at learning how to play the part that is expected of them.”

Erin M. Ancich and Jacob B. Hirsh (HBR)

Research shows that there are cognitive, emotional, and behavioral effects to power.  As middle managers navigate between high power (leading) and low power (being led), it becomes psychologically challenging to engage and disengage from one power level to another, often many times throughout a typical workday.  These conflicting roles cause feelings of stress, anxiety, and tension leading to physical risk factors such as heart disease and hypertension. In a study from Columbia University and University of Toronto, they found that mid-level employees have higher rates of anxiety and depression, adding to the long list of why middle managers are so unhappy.

Humans are inefficient when it comes to switching tasks, and it creates a negative mood spillover as we move from one task to another or one power level to another.  Middle managers are victims and carriers of change as they receive strategy instructions from the top and have to implement those strategies with those who work beneath them.  We’ve had to institute at least 10 new policies over the past 2 weeks in response to this pandemic – a taxing feat for anyone, let alone already worn down middle managers.

Most people believe that their time in middle management will be short-lived, but reality is that these employees are classified as just “stuck in the middle of everything.” They have an undergraduate degree, but not a graduate degree. They are 5-10 years into their careers, and they’re just good performers (not excellent, but not terrible either). I would also venture to guess these are the people in the midst of raising a family as well. They are considered a “neglected but critical” group.

But the #1 reason middle managers are unhappy is that they are led ineffectively. Again, middle managers stuck in the middle: expected to be good leaders when they’re not being led well.

True colors come out in times of crisis.  As Brené Brown says, “We can be our worst selves or our very best, bravest selves.”  We have a lot at stake right now, not just in health and economics, but also in business and society.  Strong leadership is essential, always.  We need to choose to be our best, bravest selves. We need to lead as we wish to be led! So, let’s lean on each other, support each other, and lift each other up. ✨💖