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Silver Linings in the Storm.
It’s been about 8 months since I’ve been here, writing from the heart. My break was not due to lack of content. While it is not unusual for me to be vulnerably honest in my struggles, I didn’t like the tone of what I was creating. I didn’t want it to sound as though I was crying out for help or attention. Because neither of those were the reality. The reality is something I had never experienced before. This past year has made me question a lot in my life. The people in it. My purpose. What is fulfilling. When I quit my job last year, I had a feeling…
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The Humbling Kind of Hard.
“Choose your hard.” A phrase, I think, coined by Mel Robbins. While the obstacles we run into are typically not our choice, how we respond to those obstacles is within our control. A while back, I mentioned that I felt I was breaking when I quit my job. Several months later, that is more true now than it was then. I am not someone who typically makes unplanned decisions or doesn’t have a back-up plan. But I followed my intuition in that decision, and I know it was ultimately for the better. When everyone told me I was not going to have any trouble finding another job, I also knew…
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Biggest Lesson of The Year.
I’ve been seeing a lot of people post about the biggest lessons they’ve learned this year, and I have been mulling over mine for the past several weeks. This has been a very significant year of growth for me, and I’m not sure I can narrow it down to one big lesson. If I had to summarize what I’ve learned into a general theme, I think my biggest lesson would be that courage can take a long time to build. The more philosophical definition states: courage is the quality of mind or spirit that enables a person to face difficulty, pain, danger, etc. without fear. I like this definition more…
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Testing My Patience … and My Faith.
I believe in God. There are numerous examples I can give where I have seen Him work in my life. But those examples are mostly in answered prayers. Putting my mind to something, and God giving me the strength and ability to achieve it. The only true test I can think of, in my experience, of questioning God, has been in overcoming depression. Years, and years, and years, would go by. Almost daily I would beg for the misery to be over, while simultaneously trusting He had a plan. It was about 10 years after my “official” diagnosis, and at least another 10 more from the onset of symptoms. At…
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Finding A Place to Shine.
The last ten to fifteen years have been some of the most influential of my life. I overcame depression, finished an associate’s degree, bachelor’s degree, and master’s degree. I began my career in agriculture, which propelled me into all sorts of things I never expected for my life. At some point, I put my head down and just went with it. While there were definitely moments of reflection and self-discovery, there was never any real pause. Which has been one of the biggest blessings in this time off. But as you know, I believe contentment is what we should strive for to lead a healthy and fulfilling life. With the…
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New Beginnings.
I quit my job on Friday. In a move that will seem abrupt to, well, basically everyone, it was a decision that was needed and a rather long time coming. I’m still a little in shock, so I’m turning to the place that always brings me comfort in processing my emotions. As I anticipate what kind of remarks I will hear when people find out, I think it really comes down to one thing: I listened to what my mind, body, and soul were telling me and acted accordingly. Was it risky? Yeah. Am I scared? Yeah. Do I feel good about it? Eh. I’m not 💯 there yet. But…