by : lacylit10 Life Lessons

Mastered.

At this time last year, a masters degree was only vaguely on my radar. I started gathering information on degree programs just a few weeks before I became registered for my first class at Brandman University on October 24th. I was looking at several different schools, but time commitment and cost were holding me back. The MyPath program gave me exactly what I wanted: control, flexibility, and affordability.

I gave myself one year to complete 12 classes. I completed 7 days short of 9 months. 🤯

A masters degree is something I kind of always wanted, but never really thought I would get. Especially, since I didn’t finish my bachelors degree until I was 33.

It’s been almost 4 weeks since I’ve been done, and it hasn’t hit me yet. Life has been so busy. The weeks have flown by, and I wonder, “how did I do school on top of all this?” So much personal time was sacrificed. It was so much work. And there has been nothing to signify the accomplishment. It almost feels as though it never happened.

No, I don’t want a party. I am not seeking recognition or praises. But it is a big deal for it not to feel like a big deal.

Bettering my professional life has been my main focus for nearly 10 years. I’m ready to stop climbing and settle into my success. I’ve made a lot of personal sacrifices over that timeframe, and now I want a more complete quality of life.

Right now though, what I really want, is a vacation.

Fortunately, I have one scheduled in just a few short weeks. And I am beyond excited.

The funny thing about school was that all I did was read and write about things that interest me. This is why I was successful in completing so quickly. I love reading and writing! But I have really missed reading books of my choosing and writing here.

It’s been a heck of a year and a half.

Beyond school, I learned a lot about myself. In learning about myself, I learned a lot about others as well. With school off my plate, I will have more energy to deal with system dysfunction and more strength to withstand the external factors trying to take me down. And you know what? I feel ready for the fight. Bring. It. On. 💪🏼

by : lacylit10 Leadership, Life Lessons

Listen.

People just straight up do. not. pay. attention.  Maybe it’s because I’m true to my word and not super forgetful that people fail to recognize that I rarely need reminding, and I say pretty much exactly what I mean.

Examples:

  • A lady emailed me about a couple of things.  I told her I would have the planting schedule to her by the end of the week, but continued to communicate with her on traceability.  By the end of our few exchanges, she said “I still need the ranches and blocks on these plantings.”  Uh, yeah, I know.  It was Wednesday.  I told her I’d have them to her by the end of the week.  I still had 2 days – intentionally giving myself this time frame to confirm some things.
  • A guy emailed me about our soon-to-be expired audits.  “Lacy, these audits are about to expire, do you have new ones?”  Nothing irritates me more than people telling me my audits are about to expire.  Like I don’t already know that. 😒 Fail, #1.  Then I say, “Yes, they were audited last week.  I have it on my calendar to send you updated audits next month when I receive them.”  3 weeks go by and I get another email.  “Lacy, do you have updated audits?”  NO!  I said a month!  3 weeks is not a month.  Also, “I have it on my calendar” means I don’t need you emailing to remind me. 🤦🏻‍♀️ Fail #2, and Fail #3.

And these are email exchanges, written clearly!  They’re just not paying attention to what I’m saying.  They can go back and reference them if they didn’t understand or if they forgot.  But no.  It’s easier to inconvenience me.  Again.

Like, I get it.  So. much. of my job is following up with people.  I spend probably ¼ of my time just reviewing shit and then calling people out when they did it wrong or untimely.  And this is typically after I’ve already laid out clear expectations!  But…

You have to give people some leeway to see how closely you have to follow.  Unfortunately, I just have a lot of people I have to follow closely.  But I don’t need that same kind of care, and it’s so frustrating to me when people don’t recognize that – in anyone.  Pay attention and learn where people are credible.  Give them autonomy in areas where they are reliable.  

Greek philosopher Epictetus said, “We have two ears and one mouth so that we can listen twice as much as we speak.”

Studies have proven this to be almost true.  We spend 70-80% of our waking hours in some form of communication. 45% of that time is spent listening. (9% writing, 16% reading, and 30% speaking.)  But most of us are actually poor, ineffective listeners.

We have the mental capacity to understand 400 words per minute, but most people speak at a rate of about 125 words per minute.  Since we’re only using 25% of our mental capability when listening to someone speak, we have 75% of our minds to do something else with.  Basically, we get bored listening to people speak and our minds wander.

Active listening is a learned skill that takes conscious effort – proven by the fact that we only remember between 25 and 50% of what we hear.  You can find tips on how to be a better listener with a quick Google search.  And yeah, I think the tips are helpful.  But I also think it comes back to people just being human.  

People want to feel heard.  I think it really can be as simple as “treat others the way you want to be treated”.  How many of us appreciate when someone checks their phone when we’re talking?  Or when you can visibly see the person has checked out of the communication?  Be present in the conversation.  Don’t skim the email, read it. 

Many people consider multi-tasking a benefit, but science has proven we cannot focus on more than one task at a time.  When we quickly move from one task to another, we do not give one task much of our attention.  We’re actually more efficient when focusing on one thing at a time.  Apply that to listening in communication, and your active listening 👂🏼 skills could probably dramatically improve.