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Avoidance.
We all value the importance of communication, but so many people avoid conversations that make them feel uncomfortable – which doesn’t solve anything. It actually makes everything worse. I’m not going to go into examples here. We all know how it feels when we don’t feel as though we’re being listened to. I tried to have one of these uncomfortable conversations with someone. I told him what I wanted to talk about, and we agreed to have the conversation at a later time when we would both be prepared to do so. But that later discussion never happened. This person invited me to have a seat at the table, then never let me pull up…
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Worth.
Normally, when I want something, I go after it to make it happen. The problem is that sometimes you can only go so far until other people play a part in whether or not you can achieve your desired outcome. I can work my ass off to get into a program, but I cannot force the board to choose me. I can put forth the effort in a relationship, but I cannot force the other person to reciprocate. At some point, you have to analyze whether or not the things you want are actually worthy of your desire. Sometimes this means walking away from something that you really want. I recently made the decision…
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The Middle.
During my United Fresh Produce Industry Leadership Program (#class24 💕), we had an incredibly smart, talented, and beautiful lady guiding us. Her name was Julie, and she was fabulous. (Still is!) She had a very polite and kind way of telling you some honest truths. She was blunt and funny. She said a lot of memorable things during our time, but the one that keeps coming to my mind in the midst of this coronavirus pandemic is this: “Get the hell out of middle management as fast as you can.” (Her words exactly.) Middle managers experience compression by those they lead and those who lead them. It’s a tough place…
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Expectations.
I had several conversations this week that essentially revolved around expectations. Each conversation was unique with different circumstances, different personalities, different goals, and different intentions. So when I said intentions don’t matter, I was kind of lying. But really, it all depends. In one conversation, we were talking about how a specific person has a reputation of over-promising and under-delivering. The consistent under-delivery has now become my expectation. Whether he cannot produce due to intentional or accidental circumstances, it doesn’t matter. The habit formed has shaped my opinion of him, and I now find him unreliable and untrustworthy. This will ultimately lead to a dissolution of the relationship, unless he…
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Conflict Resolution.
There is a man that I respect who is very intelligent but typically has bad delivery. He has these great ideas and points to make, but his thoughts are scattered when he speaks and sometimes just listening to him and/or conversations with him are hard to follow. He recognizes this about himself and even pokes fun at himself for it. I went to a meeting with him, where he vocalized his opinion and literally got laughed at. In a room full of professional adults, this lady legit lol’d during his commentary. After the meeting, he said to me, “I said what needed to be said. I don’t really care if…