by : lacylit10 Life Lessons

Friends & Family.

People never cease to amaze me – and today, I mean that in a good way! Over the past several years, I’ve grown a part from many friends and have gained many others. It doesn’t mean that I think less of those friends I don’t see or speak to often, it means that our lives have taken different directions.

As 2019 comes to a close, I think of all of that’s changed. They say that people come into your life for a reason, a season, or a lifetime. As I reflect on my friendships, old and new, I understand why these people have come and gone (or stayed) in my life. Some I expect to reconnect with once our lives re-align. Others, I recognize our time together has passed.

The thing about family though is that even when you grow a part, you are still tied together. While my professional life has taken turns that I never expected, my personal life has stayed pretty constant. Over the past several years, I’ve seen cousins marry and have children, grow in their careers and quit unhappy jobs. We’ve had health scares and hospital visits. We’ve celebrated life and mourned it as well.

I was talking to my brother-in-law a couple of weeks ago, and he said, “People don’t get our family.” I laughed. The Litten Compound is full of adventure. Between the nighttime flashlight and .22 meet-ups, the trophy photos of gophers and moles and skunks and possums and raccoons, to the rain gauge water thefts and falling trees, there is rarely a dull moment.

That adventure follows us Litten’s wherever we go. We have an amazing support system of loving and caring friends and family that thankfully find our lifestyle entertaining and choose to be part of it. But if I’m being honest, it’s taken me time to appreciate the quirks, and the changes.

I’m learning to embrace the changes and the uniqueness of our dynamic group, and it has me feeling incredibly proud of the adults my cousins have grown into, grateful that we can still depend on one another, and thankful that we’ve been raised the way we were. Looking around my social circle, I’m in disbelief that these intelligent, outgoing, motivated, and good-humored people include me in their ranks.

You are who you surround yourself with, so look around. There is so much to be thankful this holiday season.

by : lacylit10 Leadership, Life Lessons

Comfort in the Uncomfortable.

In everything I read and learn or have experienced, we connect with people when we are vulnerable. When we share something personal with someone else, all of a sudden, our differences disappear; our arguments dissolve. We no longer see that person as an enemy, but as someone who has struggles, fears, and feelings. That person becomes relatable.

As I enter different phases of my leadership journey, there’s different areas of my life that I’ve been sharing – some more difficult than others. While I’m not necessarily embarrassed by these experiences, some I would just prefer not to vocalize, often times in a room full of people I don’t know very well. It takes courage, and courage is vulnerability.

I once heard that we need to find comfort in the uncomfortable. I was like, yeah, okay. I mean, the concept isn’t a hard one to understand. Jack Canfield explains it well:

If we’re not a little bit uncomfortable every day, we are not growing. All the good stuff is outside our comfort zone.

But I’ve got to be honest, I did not feel that statement until recently.

As I travel down this road, the more I find myself in uncomfortable situations, whether that be public speaking, sharing a personal story, showing up to an event where I don’t know anyone – or whatever it may be. There is consistently new experiences. Which is awesome (and terrifying at the same time), because that means I’m moving forward and growing.

And you know what? It’s actually gotten easier.

I would consider myself a very introverted person. I like my alone time. I like to really think things over. And it takes a lot of energy to go out and network. But after going to an event or a speaking engagement or whatever it may be, I don’t go back to my car and praise Jesus that it’s over (anymore – for the most part). And that my friends, is progress.

But as someone who likes data, I can’t help but wonder if it’s only my perception that makes it seem easier or am I actually becoming more of an extrovert? At work, we talk a lot about SMART goals (Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Relatable, and Timely). Not that this was specifically one of my goals, but show me some results that measure improvement. Does this data even exist and how would I find it?

Turns out, I have some data.

I recently took the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator Assessment. If the Extrovert/Introvert scale ran from left (E) to right (I), I would have expected to be on the far right. But I actually fell closer to the middle. Nearly two years ago (October 2017), I took the DiSC Assessment and scored very, very low in Social Influence.

While these are two different types of personality tests that scientifically wouldn’t hold as legit measurable proof, they’re good enough for me! I don’t necessarily think I’ve become more of an extrovert, I think I’ve just better adapted to “turning it on”.

And I think this is exactly what finding comfort in the uncomfortable means. It’s when the hard things become easier. When you focus more on the benefits than the fear, it makes the uncomfortable a little more bearable.