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Avoidance.
We all value the importance of communication, but so many people avoid conversations that make them feel uncomfortable – which doesn’t solve anything. It actually makes everything worse. I’m not going to go into examples here. We all know how it feels when we don’t feel as though we’re being listened to. I tried to have one of these uncomfortable conversations with someone. I told him what I wanted to talk about, and we agreed to have the conversation at a later time when we would both be prepared to do so. But that later discussion never happened. This person invited me to have a seat at the table, then never let me pull up…
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Worth.
Normally, when I want something, I go after it to make it happen. The problem is that sometimes you can only go so far until other people play a part in whether or not you can achieve your desired outcome. I can work my ass off to get into a program, but I cannot force the board to choose me. I can put forth the effort in a relationship, but I cannot force the other person to reciprocate. At some point, you have to analyze whether or not the things you want are actually worthy of your desire. Sometimes this means walking away from something that you really want. I recently made the decision…
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Impeccable.
In the Four Agreements, Don Miguel Ruiz defines impeccable as “without sin”. A sin is anything that you do which goes against yourself. Don Miguel Ruiz Who we are has been shaped by the morals, values, opinions, judgments, and fears of those around us. Most notably, our parents who have influenced our entire belief system since birth. How do we know who we really are when so much of who we are has been influenced by others? Their thoughts have become engrained in our minds as if they are our own. Personally, I think this is why emotional intelligence and self-awareness is critical to our function. Our bodies react to our emotions. When we pay…
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The Middle.
During my United Fresh Produce Industry Leadership Program (#class24 💕), we had an incredibly smart, talented, and beautiful lady guiding us. Her name was Julie, and she was fabulous. (Still is!) She had a very polite and kind way of telling you some honest truths. She was blunt and funny. She said a lot of memorable things during our time, but the one that keeps coming to my mind in the midst of this coronavirus pandemic is this: “Get the hell out of middle management as fast as you can.” (Her words exactly.) Middle managers experience compression by those they lead and those who lead them. It’s a tough place…
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Emotional.
Remember when I wrote about listening to the wrong podcast episode of The Happiness Lab that prompted the post Sharing is Caring? Well, I finally listened to the episode that was originally recommended for me to listen to. It was called “Don’t Think of the White Bear.” I don’t even remember why this specific episode was recommended to me by a colleague. I think we were talking about how emotions are contagious. But what I took away from the episode was actually justification to my feelings in the post Let Me Be. Turns out, the best way to get over our emotions is to fully embrace them, while we’re feeling…
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Guilt.
I recently read a quote that said you need to put others’ needs before your own. As someone trained in leadership, I know that you cannot be a successful leader without first taking care of yourself. You are at the foundation of your leadership, and if the foundation is weak, everything else will be too. Rachel Hollis lists her priorities: Herself Her marriage Her children Most people would look at this list and totally give her flack for putting herself and her husband before her children, but I get it and fully stand behind her. You know that saying, “When mom doesn’t feel good, no one feels good”? Everyone feels…